Friday, August 31, 2012

Finish Him!!!

Finish Him

Thursday, August 30, 2012

I don`t have a type... | True Quote

I don`t have a type If I like you, I like you.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Troll student

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Do you realize what she is doing? | Funny Image

Monday, August 27, 2012

I`ll beat a motherfucker...

I`ll beat a motherfucker with another motherfucker

Sunday, August 26, 2012

What did the lightbulb say to its moth...

What did the lightbulb say to its mother? I wuv you watts and watts.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Parents | True Quote

Friday, August 24, 2012

Granny`s prescription

With Granny`s new glaucoma prescription there was finally peace in the house.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Anything you say can and will be held against you | Funny

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Batman style beard

Batman style beard

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Roses are red & My screen is blue

Sunday, August 19, 2012

A guy walks into a bar with his pet mon...

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking it the monkey is running wild. The monkey jumps up on the pool table and grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

The bartender is livid and says to the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"

"No. What did that stupid monkey do this time?" says the patron.

"Well, he just swallowed the cue ball off the pool table, whole" says the bartender.

"Yeah, well I hope it kills him because he's been driving me nuts" says the patron.

The guy finishes his drink and leaves.

Two weeks later he comes back with the monkey. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running wild around the bar again. While the man is drinking his drink, the monkey finds some peanuts on the bar. He grabs one, sticks it up his butt, then pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.

"Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.

"What now?" responds the patron. "Well, he stuck a peanut up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it" says the bartender.

"Well, what do you expect?" replied the patron. "Ever since he ate that darn cue ball he measures everything first!"


Friday, August 17, 2012

One Free Wish | Funny Image

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

The real mouse

The real mouse (mousepad not included)

Monday, August 13, 2012

What kind of bees make milk?

What kind of bees make milk? Boo-bees!

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Static Electricity

Static Electricity "Yeah, really funny... rub me on the carpet and then put me in the shipping box,,, You will pay for this!"

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Android & Apple | Funny Image

ANDROID An apple a day keeps the Doctor away

Friday, August 10, 2012

10 Husbands, Still a Virgin | Funny Joke

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" said the puzzled groom.

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"

"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"

"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

Thursday, August 9, 2012

At a world brewing convention in the St...

At a world brewing convention in the States, the CEOs of various Brewing organizations retired to the bar at the end of each day's conference.

Bruce, CEO of Fosters, shouted to the Barman: "In 'Strylya, we make the best bladdy beer in the world, so pour me a Bladdy Fosters, mate."

Bob, CEO of Budweiser, calls out next: "In the States, we brew the finest beers in the world, and I make the King of them all gimme a Bud."

Hans steps up next: "In Germany ve invented das beer, verdamt. Give me ein Becks, ya ist Der real King of beers, danke."

Paddy, CEO of Guinness, steps forward "Barman, would ya give me a doyet coke wid ice and lemon. Tanks."

The others stare at him in stunned silence, amazement written all over their faces. Eventually Bruce asks, "Are you not going to have a Guinness, Pat?"

Paddy replies: "Well, if you fookin' pansies aren't drinkin', then neither am I".

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

I was going to quit | Funny Image

I was going to quit all my bad habits. I really was! But then it occured to me that no one likes a quitter!

Monday, August 6, 2012

Thinking the same... | Funny Image

Are we thinking the same Mr. Zazzels? Yes my dear human, let`s kill them all

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Male reaction to 50 shades of gray | Funny Image

How can you fap to this? There`s no pictures...

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Did you mean CAPTAIN

Captain, Captain Jack Sparrow

Friday, August 3, 2012

My Bear Hands | Funny Image

I`ll kill you with my bear hands

Thursday, August 2, 2012

How to win a poke war

How to win a poke war on facebook

Wednesday, August 1, 2012


The more people i meet... | True Quote

The More People I Meet, The Less I Want To Leave The House.